Embarrassing Subliminal Crush

For most of my life, liking people has been disastrous. Not just with romantically liking people, either. I was the new kid in 5th grade and I scanned the room for a new friend. The girl I chose, Crystal, turned out to be mean and completely uninterested in being friends with me. At the end of the year, I consoled myself with the knowledge that she had no friends in the class, so it wasn’t all me. But still!

I totally and completely blame Hunny for my most recent embarrassing crush moment. His favorite basketball player, Steve Nash, retired last season and Hunny was on the hunt for a new orange ball handling hero.

As you know, Hunny is my best friend. We tell each other everything. In my quest to be Hunny’s dream wife, I actively listen and do my best to participate in all his interests. Even ones that are not particularly interesting to me. I know almost as much as Hunny knows about Steve Nash: he’s Canadian, plays basketball for his country in the Olympics, has a set of twin children, plays soccer in the off season, won NBA MVP or Player of the Year twice, was a spokesman for Vitamin Water, drafted to the Pheonix Suns, he was traded to the Mavericks, played for the Suns a second time, friends with my favorite former Duke player Grant Hill, and retired with the LA Lakers. Once he chose Kevin Love as his new basketball athlete to watch and revere, I was ready to memorize.

Hunny shared all the Instagram posts with me: training camp, visiting sick children in the hospital, charitable events, goofing around with teammates, pictures of him as a child, and being jersey “0” for the Cavaliers.

Love. 0. Like tennis. Cute.

Flash forward to the ’14-’15 NBA Playoffs. Kevin Love was injured in one of the first games. Hunny called me into my parent’s den to see the announcers of the game commenting on a picture of him giving the thumbs up from a hospital bed.

Sorry your guy is injured. Maybe he’ll get better and play in another game.

Hunny informed me he was out for the playoffs, and I felt sorry for him.

What happened next is a shocking blur of events. I don’t quite remember all the details.

One of the final games, possibly THE final game, I watched with Hunny at our house. I was watching while reading and every so often Hunny would yell out, “Look! It’s {fill in the blank with some athlete or celebrity or sports figure who no longer plays}!” and “Watch this replay!” I also looked  up once in a while so that if Hunny asked if I had seen “that play,” I could confirm I had seen whatever play. At one of these moments, I saw Kevin Love watching the game from the sidelines.

A 14 year old fangirl voice practically screamed, “LOOK! IT’S KEVIN LOVE!” I felt my face catch on fire at the realization that I was pointing to the TV. That voice came from me! I looked over at Hunny, who was looking at me, completely horrified and stunned simultaneously.

I didn’t know he was out of the hospital, I mumbled.

“What was that?!?!”

I don’t know!

Looking back, I think it was all the visiting sick children and charitable work with kids that got to me. I’m a sucker for a man who’s kind and caring to children (Hunny works with children and is kind and caring to them, by the way). I still don’t understand how I developed a crush on Kevin Love without my knowledge. How did that even happen?

He does look like he could be Hunny’s twin. And their moms have the same name. How weird is that?

Needless to say, Hunny is not a Kevin Love fan anymore. He likes a player for the Charlotte Hornets, Frank “The Tank.” I don’t remember his last name and I’m not going to learn it, either.

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